Not That Girl
by Mia Vaan
Summary: It was really nothing at first. She would catch an occasional glance here and there whenever she walked across the campus between classes; he was always dressed immaculately in his grey commander uniform, his dark hair without a single strand out of place and his pointed ears stood out from the rest. Christine Chapel found him strangely attractive.


So. New fandom.

This is just something small, to get myself used to writing with these characters...by writing about a character who never really appeared in the reboot series.

I guess I was just curious about Christine Chapel, considering she was a recurring character in TOS. McCoy mentioned her in passing in the first film, and Carol mentioned her specifically in the second. It was her second mention which really got me curious; she apparently left because of an implied relationship between her and Jim, which was odd considering she never had a thing for Jim in TOS.

Spock, on the other hand...

The story _Deeper Into Darkness_ made a short mention of this, so I owe the author of that story credit. Basically this oneshot tells why Christine left the _Enterprise_ before the second movie, and what she'd been up to until that point. The events in the IDW Ongoing comics will be referenced, but you don't have to have read them in order to understand what goes on here; what happens in the comics is this universe's versions of TOS.

As for the name of this story, it references the song "I'm Not That Girl" from the musical _Wicked_.

I'll probably write a multi-chapter story at some point in the future.

* * *

It was really nothing at first.

She would catch an occasional glance here and there whenever she walked across the campus between classes; he was always dressed immaculately in his grey commander uniform, his dark hair without a single strand out of place and his pointed ears stood out from the rest.

Christine Chapel found him strangely attractive.

She finally confessed to her room-mate, Carol Marcus, during their third year at the academy. It was Carol who discovered the Vulcan's name – Spock, such a pleasant name – but it was also Carol who warned her against the idea of a relationship. Spock was not only an instructor – and there were strict rules about instructors getting involved with the cadets – but he was also Vulcan. Vulcans were betrothed at a very young age; Spock most likely had a wife back on his home planet.

She knew this; she really did. But that didn't stop her from memorizing the places he would be and the times at which he would be there, thus making sure to be there herself if only to catch a glance of him. If he had notice her increasing presence in his life he never acknowledged it, but that was fine with her. For the time being, she was just content to watch him from afar.

But then came that fateful day when Vulcan was destroyed.

She could remember the day well; she'd been in the medical bay, and Dr. McCoy had asked her to prepare medication in order to treat a severe reaction one of his patients had experienced. When it had been prepared Dr. McCoy had snatched it from her, not even saying thank you, before he took off after his patient who had decided to leg it.

The attack had come out of nowhere, and she found herself treating multiple injuries at once. Not a good start to a maiden voyage.

At some point the elderly Vulcans had arrived, seeking treatment, and Spock had been with them. She bit her lip and tried not to look at him, afraid that he would see her face flushing, but she was eventually asked by McCoy to check for wounds.

When she approached, she noticed that he did not look very Vulcan, compared to the uncountable times she'd seen him before. His eyes were full of emotion; sorrow, for the loss of his home world, and upon listening to the other nurses, she discovered that Spock had lost his mother, too.

She wordlessly ran a scan on him, checking for any internal wounds. He'd inhaled dust from the planet, she saw, but it seemed to be clearing up so she did nothing about it.

She finally spoke when she could not stand the silence any longer. "I'm sorry. For your loss, I mean."

He didn't even turn to acknowledge her, and part of her could understand. But another part of her wanted him to acknowledge her; to turn to her and tell her everything, his pain, his suffering, his emotion... But she knew it would not come. He was a Vulcan.

Only when he left did she realize how distracted she had been by him. For if she had been paying closer attention to her scanners, she would have realized that Spock was half-Human.

When word spread that Spock would be leaving, her heart fell. "Maybe it's for the best," Carol had told her, when she'd called. "Now you can move on from this unhealthy obsession."

Obsession. She hardly called it an obsession. She preferred to think of it as admiration of the affectionate kind.

She tried to ignore the warning bells when she discovered that he had come back, and her heart had leapt.

As she had done before, she memorized the locations he would be and what time he would be there, but since they were on a ship instead of at the academy, she knew it would be harder not to draw attention to herself. After an incident with a crew member named Gary Mitchell, she suspected that McCoy knew what she was doing, but he never said anything.

Things were going well for her – until Spock had gone on a scientific investigation into the Murasaki 312 formation, and everything had changed.

She made sure to keep taps on the situation, checking in on the status of the mission between her duties in the medical bay. Spock's craft had gone missing, and butterflies were swarming in her stomach with worry. She wasn't quite sure what she would do if he never came back.

The captain then sent her a message, asking her to prepare for the crew who had come back alive – that included Spock.

With a smile on her face, she prepared. McCoy came in first, followed by Mr. Scott and two others she didn't recognized. Then Spock had entered, being aided by Lt. Uhura.

She ran tests on him, but every so often her eyes would glance up at Uhura, who had not left Spock's side even after he'd settled down. She would have thought Uhura would be needed back at her station; she hadn't been part of the investigation party.

As time wore on, she began to grow more and more agitated over Uhura's presence, but she couldn't quite work out why. She concluded that it was because the communications officer wasn't supposed to be there, but she couldn't exactly tell her to go back to her station; Uhura outranked her.

With the tests done, she turned to pack up the equipment, but paused when she saw Uhura move closer to Spock. She only saw out of the corner of her eye, and she didn't dare look any further; her heart was already hurting with worry and heartbreak, and turning completely would only make things worse.

The door opened and the captain walked in, heading straight for Spock and Uhura. Even though there were no rules against romantic relationships between officers, she hoped that Kirk wouldn't approve; that he would tell them to separate. But as she listened to their conversation, she realized that Kirk seemed to fully support their relationship, and even confined them to shared quarters for a few hours.

When the two left, the tips of their fingers touching, she dropped the equipment she hadn't realized she'd been holding.

"I know I should have told you," said McCoy, coming up behind her. "But I suppose it was better this way. May help you move on."

She tried to move on. She really did. But finding out about Spock's relationship with Uhura only made things worse.

She began to notice things she hadn't noticed before; that Spock would always play a game of chess with Uhura, and that she would always touch his hand – only a light touch, unnoticeable – after making her move. Spock would visit her quarters after both of their shifts were over, and would not leave again until late. Things which had been obvious before, but she hadn't noticed due to her earlier blindness.

She contacted Carol again.

"He's obviously happy with her," Carol had said. "Move on, and please don't do anything you'll regret later."

She tried to act normal. She tried to act like seeing those two together didn't bother her.

But then Spock was attacked by the organism from Deneva.

She worked hard with McCoy to get it off him. They finally did, and were able to secure it, but then Spock began to respond in agony. McCoy restrained him, but forced her out of the room so she wouldn't get hurt. She tried to stay – she wanted to help Spock anyway she could – but then McCoy ordered her and she had no choice.

Spock calmed down, and when Kirk and McCoy left to talk, she approached him carefully.

"Nurse Chapel, I am fine," he informed her, without even looking in her direction. "There is no need for you to be cautious around me. The pain is not in control."

So she took several steps closer until she was right there, right next to him. Close enough to touch.

And before she realized it, she was reaching out to do just that.

But Spock turned and looked her dead in the eyes, and she knew what he was telling her. She withdrew her hand.

"I am aware of your affection for me, Nurse Chapel," he spoke softly. She was surprised by this; she had always been so careful. "I have known for sometime, but I never made this known to you for the logical reason Nyota informed me of; that you would move on. You would soon realize that this affection is only one-sided, and would allow it to pass."

She took a step back.

"I am sorry, Nurse Chapel." He never used her first name. Just her title. "Vulcans bond for life. And I have bonded with Nyota."

He used Uhura's first name. He didn't use hers.

When her shift was over, she hurried back to her quarters quickly. She didn't want anyone to see the tears in her eyes. She'd always had hope, she realized, even when she saw him with Uhura, but upon being told by him outright...

She contacted Carol, who only repeated her previous advice; move on, and don't do anything regrettable.

The first she tried to follow. The second she didn't after the first failure.

She tried to get into a relationship with a security officer named Hendorff – or Cupcake, as the captain had nicknamed him. Hendorff was like her; he had been admiring someone from afar, but had lost that someone to another. Ironically, it was Uhura he had been admiring.

"My dad said at graduation that I should hurry up and marry her before someone else did," he said to her once. "Seems I was too late."

She had lost Spock to Uhura. He had lost Uhura to Spock. She thought they would do nicely together.

Despite the loss, Hendorff didn't seem to resent Spock; in fact, he admired the Vulcan for making a quicker move than him, an achievement for a Vulcan.

But she couldn't help but despise Uhura. There was no stopping it, no matter how hard she tried. It was probably why Hendorff broke things off with her.

"You're not really over him," he had said, when she had asked why.

That's when she had made the regrettable decision and gotten involved with Jim Kirk.

She had known about his reputation. And yet, she had done it. Part of her wondered if it had been a final attempt to get Spock's attention – by sleeping with his best friend.

Of course, nothing had come out of it, and while Kirk moved on to other women she was left with an empty heart and no sense of purpose. She didn't know what to do.

She contacted Carol again. She cried. She spilled out her heart. She didn't know what to do or where to go. She couldn't be on this ship anymore, not with Spock there.

Then Carol gave her a solution. The outer frontier was looking for highly trained nurses, and she fit the bill. She would be transferred over without fuss, and would never have to see Spock again. Never see those pointed ears, that dark hair and those dark eyes...

She accepted. She really was obsessed, and the only way to kill obsession was to separate it.

When Carol contacted her a few weeks later, Christine Chapel had found her soul mate in a man named Roger Korby and was much happier.


End file.
